Warrior Princess

Dear readers, “Cherish every moment you have with your loved ones, because you didn’t know, when will the time come, you just only can wish you could have it again with them”. This week’s blog post topic is not about tale stories or any legend warrior, but this topic is dedicated to my dear beautiful friend who is a warrior for me. This is about her journey in fighting severe illness. I’m sharing her story to give hope, it could give a lesson and awareness to all of you and may her journey be not just staying like that but could help others too.

“When you love someone, define it with the time you spend with them. Either you make a time or have time for them”

My time with her is defined by having a time, and not make a time. And I regretted. I just can wish for now that I am still given more chance in future to fix it back even for a short period of time.

First step journey

In 2019, she was diagnosed with Stevens-Johnson syndrome because of drug allergy in the pain killer she consumed. It’s not her first time taking it but the type of the medication may have reacted differently as she had before. The medication she takes still didn’t reduce her pain and she still keep eating it and the early symptoms starts. She was having fevers, back pain and added with sore throat. She didn’t think anything bad until second symptoms come out when her skin start shows multiple discrete red purples skin lesions on all part of her body. I repeat, all part. She quickly went to the government clinic and the doctor directly call ambulance to take her to specialist hospital. She was admitted for few weeks. Doctor told her that she’s almost late and if she comes later, it will affect her heart and can be life threatening. I can’t hold my tears, when I looked at the photo, that she sent to me. The blister and rash on her face, crusty sores on her lips. The bright and smooth skin she had were replaced with a lot of red purples moles all over her face. Blister on her lips make difficult for her to eat that time. It’s not something easier to accept especially for a woman when your face turns out like that. Even just have few pimples can make women stress and lose confident, so imagine what she had to get through when her face and her lips turn like that.

Every day she is given with 10 different kinds of medicines. It feels like as if she’s an experimental object because doctors must always test her in order to get a suitable medication for her. Due to this, she can’t take the shower product anymore. She got some body cream to start applying. The entire product must first be approved by the doctor. Her prayer for her body continued to change. Every time she took a bath, she felt ache. There was a while of irritation on her skin, bleeding skin and peeing. She has got to bear the itchy thing and she’s had the time to scratch on her hand and ankle, which makes her itchy too. The doctor has to bandage all over her palms and her ankle to ensure no infection. After few weeks, her skin shows improvements. The purples red lesion reduces and gone. But still her skin suffers serious eczema. She even feels embarrassed when I said I want to sleep over her house because of few supplications she needs to apply after bath. Despite those things, she’s still working hard on her job as usual and not let those things stop her to make a life.

The answer for the pain

After one year plus with Steven-Johnson syndrome, in 2020, she kept feeling the pain on her back and her butt. And again, she didn’t think anything negative. She just eats ‘Panadol’ to relief her pains. But then, she realises she kept losing appetite and for less than two months, she loses weight about 10kg. She always has to take Medical Leave. The worst part is when she gets fever with chills and her body were sweating at night. But she still just eats ‘Panadol’ and muscles relief. Then, in January 2021, the pain keeps increasing that sometimes the pain will stay from night till dawn. These symptoms start making her to lose focus on her job because she couldn’t sleep well, easily tired, lose weight, pale, and there had a time she has to bend a bit when walking to reduce feeling of her pains.

One day, her housemate, suddenly pat her butt and she felt so painful until stabbing pain in her stomach. She quickly goes to clinic and after scan, it shows the result that there is cyst twisted type grow near her ovaries. That night she was referred to hospital for surgery because can’t wait longer and about two cysts were removed. She feels grateful and ease because she could sleep well that night after the surgeries. Unfortunately, tomorrow at night, she gets fever with chills again and her back pain again that make the doctor gave her high dose of antibiotics and not allowed her to discharge soon. She didn’t show any improvement and the doctor suggest her to do CT scan. She couldn’t believe that time, when the result show there are tumours under her neck. The second surgery went and about 6cm tumour were removed.

Biggest test

The suffering not just end like that. The biggest suffering to fight comes when while surgery, the doctor saw more white blood comes out. She was advised to take few tests to get confirmation of the disease. On 4 February 2021 which is Cancer Days, the doctor told her that the result show she was diagnosed of Lymphoma Cancer. She felt all her world dark and stopped. She feels so down and cried harder as much as she could. Then, she knew that she couldn’t fight alone anymore because her body was very weak and no more courage to stand and walk like before. She also has to find courage, not because to get through treatment process but to be ready hear another result which is the stage of her cancer.

Two weeks before she knew the stage of her cancer and at that time, she told me on the phone she has cancer, I just couldn’t believe it’s true. My heart sank and I couldn’t focus on my job. I just want to hug her and comfort her. I cry and cry, and keep thinking all those happen to her within short period of time. I do tell her if I could get at least one day to take care of her. But I didn’t get that chance because her parents came and she had to go back to her hometown at Sarawak to continue treatment there and get close with her parents. I feel hopeless, frustrated. I really want to meet her. Pandemic makes more harder for us. I couldn’t visit her in hospital and travel far. I pray to God, at least give me something and be grateful. She gets to meet me two days before she flies back to her hometown.

I meet her on 19 February. She looks so beautiful and bright. Like have lights on her face and so different. I said to myself that I would not cry in front of her as so she would feel weaker. Then when she tells me her cancer were at stage 4 and already spread to her back and other part of her body but she will get more details once she starts treatment at her hometown hospital. I try to calm as much as I could. But my voice starts to vibrate slowly. Her cousin accompanies her because she actually couldn’t go out anywhere and have to just lay on the bed, but because of me, she tried. Touched. I hug her, and I feels her body not strong as before. I try hide my tears by hugging her bit longer. She eats with me. She smiles, make jokes and laugh like nothing happens. Try to comfort me because I know my face show it all. She actually couldn’t sit properly since her back already affects. But she tries show she enjoy eating. I saw how she try to hide her pain. I just think want to hug her and look at her as much as I could. Then I saw her palm and ankle still have effect of the Steven John syndrome. Guys, it’s terrible. Skin at her ankle hard and bit darker, redness, and lesions. Her palm so dry, wrinkle and allergies. I can’t hold my tear anymore. She hugs me and said please don’t cry, she can’t cry anymore because too much cried before. She promises me, she will fight till to recover as long as she gives a chance. I’m so proud of her. She tells me, that she must be so special and so strong than ever, that’s why she was tested like that.

Now, she still in quarantined time before can get to the hospital for the treatment process. For 6-month treatment, every day she will update the story to let other people get the awareness. Every day she said she glad and can’t believe she still alive and how she tries harder to keep fight her cancer. At first, I am scared if I will lose her so soon and there have time, I got nightmare and I texted her at 4am to ensure nothing happen to her. But now, I just want her to know that she’s not fighting this alone. Always be loved and she already done beyond than incredible things to be strong till now. Although I wish she will recover soon and can get back here to celebrate our friendship anniversary in September, but the result is still on God’s hand. I just don’t want her suffer anymore. Too much suffer she had gone through now.

To all the reader out there. Take this story as lesson and spread this awareness. Sometimes the things look simply and nothing much could give negative impact at the end. Sorry for this long story and thank you sticking till the end.

Written by Ija

Are you feeling not so okay? This piece is for you then.

Taken from thirteenthoughts.com

I just felt I need to let the universe know about what I’m going through and that it is okay to feel like that sometimes. Let’s see what lesson you can bring back to your life and apply from my experience.

It has been quite a number of weeks in which my heart just wants me to write but I’m procrastinating it until like just now.

This post is just going to be something that I’m going through personally and please do not have a judgmental mind because if not you will not see the lesson.

I’m going to break these into segments of my life, I’m not that old yeah……hahahaha……but kinda…..but who cares right

1. Family

For me my family, teammates, colleagues, close friends come first then everything else. I value spending time with people more than just using my phone, but it must be someone I really love listening to their conversations. I felt something was not so okay with me and surprisingly everyone around me could also feel me the same. Dear reader, I do believe very much in vibes too, sometimes you just felt that person or being somewhere is not so right, I believe in that intuition. I wasn’t actually happy inside, I couldn’t love people fully, something was blocking me to shine fully. I spoke to my well-wisher, mentor, good friend and kinda my favorite person to talk to, as well I listen to him when he tells me to do something, do take note I’m not very easy person to follow what you say cause I have so much ego, but I’m learning to listen to people more.

That’s when I realized I’m just not moving on from my past life, I thought I was moving on but in fact I wasn’t, it means I’m still not accepting myself and what I did last time. That unacceptance is killing me inside and that’s why I couldn’t love people full-heartedly. Even though I learned and has practiced SIEP (refer to my previous blog to know what is this), I couldn’t do it. I met my mentor very long time ago about this and we spoke. I was feeling better, and now after 1 year it still come back. No matter how long I calm myself and take deep breaths or divert my attention to something else, it was draining me and that’s why I felt so energy less. It was like the moment I’m home, I just want to lie back. To overcome this whole drama, I thought the best way is to write about it and let it out as much as I can.

I realized one thing moving on is not something done theoretically, it’s an inside work, your entire mind, body and soul need to accept that incident full-heartedly, only then you will be the real you. Thank you Nature for showing this through one person. If you are also in this phase of your life, listen dear readers, you are far more powerful than you think you are now, you are capable and you deserve to see more beautiful opportunities in life. After all we are here to live life, not to regret life. Trust me, there’s so much positive and mind-blowing things waiting for you. Just take a moment with me to take a deep breath and calm your emotions…..1 deep breath……….2 deep breath………..3 deep breath…….Are you feeling better now?

Taking deep breath (Taken from Photo by Karolina Grabowska from Pexels )

2. Work/Business/Employment

PHASE 1

I have heard people saying personal life and work life cannot come together, also I have seen people saying personal life and work life is actually one, you can’t separate them. BUT FOR ME, BOTH LIFE ARE THE SAME because myself is the same.

I actually was making huge decisions in my life few weeks and months back. After talking to my mentor and well-wisher, I made the decision. He asked me this ” Is this what you really want to do or are you competing with someone else? Be truthful to yourself”

That strengthen my heart and I took the decision to follow my heart. Even though at first it looked so alien and felt abit awkward. It just felt so me, I love to take things in charge and try out new things and serve people through my service, that makes me really happy. With the decision being made, I spoke to my leader (current employer) who inspires me in the work he does every single day. He’s one of the person who loves accounting, auditing and taxation, he just do it with so passion. I was finding someone like this for so long. He listens to my goals and dreams, I said I’m going to resign the job very soon because I want to do something on my own, he didn’t stop me but gave me a piece of advice because he cared about me, he said you are really good at this then why are doing something else. I told 1 thing only, this is what my heart wants, then he suggested me this which is why don’t you work for 2 days then the rest of the days you work on whatever you want to work on. You will not believe this that this was one of the goal I planted in dark which is to work lesser in a company as well as work in the part which I love rather than the entire process.

I took few days to think and finally I accepted, because to guide students or create awesome videos, I do need the practical experience. I spoke to him back and not very soon this is going to happen.

I thought this transition would be easy, but it is not as easy as I thought, now I don’t have fixed income, I do have but lesser now, however this is so much exciting and makes me to wake up in the middle of night as well as in the morning to think how to generate income from the skills and the services I have. I started thinking like an entrepreneur. And I loved it. The journey won’t be so easy but it would definitely be worthwhile. I just need to have fun and keep hustling. “Life is so beautiful”

PHASE 2

I’m actually working on a client’s account by my own, which means with least supervision from my leader. That means you need to think and make most of the decisions on your own. And that’s exactly what I’m , I love the freedom of making decisions. So this was the situation, the job was getting very delayed due to previous year accounts. And I will also accept my mistake, it was my first time taking a job with my full freedom, so I actually freaked a little but I tried my best. However, I didn’t do a good job with the accounts as the auditor started to ask me what kind of accounts is this and things like that. I had to manage my client, auditor as well as myself. Luckily I didn’t cry……hahahaha…..I do this when the scenario around me is uncontrollable or if I can’t find a solution.

I would just need to be grateful to the nature to give such great client and auditor because they helped me to figure this out and I said I will take the blame and get this things figure out. The most important part is the “satisfaction of the client”, that’s all I need. My mentor and leader say clients are the most important people in any business, say it product-based or service-based.

DON’T AIM FOR PERFECTION, AIM FOR PROGRESS.

Unknown

I guess that’s all my heart want to share. Till then take care and have a great day ahead.

With Love,

Crazy Geek Team

WHAT IS ONE THING THAT YOU WOULD WANT TO CHANGE IN YOUR LIFE?

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I want to ask you something. If you could change one thing in your life, what would you change? It can be any type of change. Maybe you want to have a healthiery diet. Maybe you want to spend some time for yourself. Maybe you want to be able to swim. Imagine that there is no limit to what you could change about your life. Well, what would that change be?

Here is where my head is at right now for that change.

If I could change one thing about my life, I would focus more on the art of ‘Overthinking’. I’ve come to the conclusion that it is probably one of my more hard-hitting habits. To this day, overthinking is something that I deal with on occasion and it shouldn’t come as a surprise. As much as we like to see ourselves in a positive light, we’re pretty quick about demoralizing ourselves. Usually, I’ve jumped to conclusions quickly and sometimes those conclusions are thoughts that drag me down. That’s the ‘3 am’ horror zone of me overanalyzing every aspect of my life. I’m sure those who are in my shoes, you could feel me deep. Here are the few ways that I’ve made myself to stop overthinking.

One suggestion I’ll make is using logic and putting things into perspective. I like this mainly because I’m a logical type of thinker. No one said it better than Marcus Aurelius in Meditations, “Our life is what our thoughts make it.” I believe in that. I need to have a reason behind my actions and they’re typically deeper-rooted. It really helps me because more often than not I’ve realized that making a huge deal over something small. This method is a way of catching myself to realize there is a pattern. Because like I said, overthinking is a habit. And once I catch myself enough, my brain automatically catches the vibes too. Isn’t sound cool? It is . For example, during times of stress or worry, I reassure myself and remind me of one thing, “I wouldn’t be doing this unless I have a logical explanation for going ahead.” This shuts down my overthinking because I know things will be alright. And if for some chance I make a mistake or fail, I usually learn something from the experiences.

Furthermore, I wasn’t ready to be lost in negative thoughtss habits, but the probability increasesmultiplied each time when I haven’t had a proper sleep. Somehow, we tend to neglect this factor, but definitely shouldn’t. I was unable to think as clear as I usually I do and what to say about all those thoughts running aaround and aaround in my head. Here is how I ensure my proper quality of sleep and as I’m a sleepy head that makes methis literally to take anmeans double extrathe effort to work on it. Forcing myself to sleep when I’m not sleepy is a bad idea. Don’t feel sleepy? I’ll just keep myself busy withcatch-up on my readings to put me calm myin mind before knocking completely dozing off. I have no idea how it works for me, butme but miraculouslytrust me it works this way. Not forgetting with my earphones nearby listening to my kind of lullaby before bed. They played a very good role into putting me into sleep much calmer and better withinto all my sweet dreams however loud the nature white noise is. “Your future depends on your dreams, so go to sleep.” – Mesut Bara zany

Besides that, I should say this one is the hardest for me personally. I do try to spend my time and put my energy in the present moment. Unfortunately, I have to say I’ve failed so many times. Overthinking the past moments which will never come back or worrying about the possible future is the most common and unavoidable thing ever. That’s not my style either. I just can’t fool myself like that. Well, I’ve decided to let go of every thought in my mind. Doing something I actually like no matter what, how small or big. I genuinely enjoy it. Listening to music, aerobics, or spending time with family and friends. As I realized later on, how much it means a lot to me. That point of time I don’t think about my goals, failures, or the things I have to do tomorrow. I’m just here. Right now. At this very moment. Temporary escape from reality will do. Just like the moment you’re taking to read these words. Are you with me?

These are the best I could get myself on track to avoid thinking too much. A good going personally by working this way out my scrabble mind. However, overthinking has also caused me to come to a lot of good conclusions in my life too. Not every overthought was an issue that was never there to begin with. Do you agree? Whether this is in regards to education, jobs or relationship just remember that your thoughts are your mediators and also your peacekeeper. So, you may be wondering when I’m ever going to get to the point of ‘why overthinking is an art’. Maybe it’s an art because individually, we are all able to have such vivid and creative imagination or simply just the art of conjuring up problems that were actually never there to begin with.

In a nutshell, whatever your thoughts are about, it has always been you and only you that can decided whether you will let them get the best of you or make them the best you. However, I felt from the changeover of myself with those efforts I’ve taken to bring me peaceful mind. Overthinking is draining, but it is also helpful in determining how much you are going to let your mind control your happiness and peace. Don’t stop thinking but not overthinking. Let go of all your thoughts about yesterday that is never worth your precious time. A very special piece for my dear overthinker’s. Wake up, startup fresh! Wishing you always the best. Enjoy every moment in your life. “The beginning of freedom is the realization that you are not the possessing entity — the thinker.”

Written by: Laavanyah

With Love, Crazy Geek Team

Fear of Missing Out (FOMO)

Spending the evening scrolling through Facebook or Instagram and only one thing runs through my mind, “What am I doing, or why am I not doing this?”. Have you compared your life to the highlights of others’ lives? Suddenly, our sense of having a better time gets skewed and you seem to be doing worse than others. This is just one example of FOMO, or “fear of missing out”. It creeps up on you before you even realise it.

I was out with my extended family for dinner last year and was all excited to meet my cousins for some juicy gossip and to have a good time. We were seated on a round table and to my surprise, minutes after greeting and acknowledging everyone’s presence there, the phones were out. They were focused more on posting pictures on social media and scrolling the feeds so that they don’t miss out on any updates about their social media friends, instead of being present. It’s a matter of ‘FOMO’. We miss out on appreciating the here and now and the people seated right across from you.

“The fear of missing out on the “next big thing”. According to two Stanford researchers, the thing investors fear most is not entirely the risk of loss, but what if they have done poorly compared to their peers or what if they are the only one in the neighbourhood who has missed out on the next best investment.

FOMO could also be related to work performance. Being in accounting industry, being focused and detail oriented is the key. Have you experienced, when you take a break and scroll through your social media, you get distracted and insecure of how people are living their lives and what have you done to live an impactful life? Minutes later, when you tried to get back to work, your focus is split. This may vary and be subjective to every individual but sometimes the fear of missing out could also affect our performance.

This a real phenomenon that is quite common these days among many age groups. It’s a concept that anyone who has made any kind of decisions can relate to. The fear of missing out on any kind of opportunity or experience. Even those of us with strong minds and who are steadfast would sometimes ponder on the context of “what if”. We tend to retrace our steps and wonder ‘what if’ I’d taken up on the other offer? Would my prospects have been better?” No one knows!

Fortunately, we can curb FOMO if it is something you have experienced. HOW?

• Avoid comparisons

Stop comparing your life to the life of people posting on social media. You do not know about them behind the scenes. Every one of us has different goals and challenges. I can almost hear your mind “It is easier said than done”, Yes, I totally agree with you. Just find a way that works for you that stops comparing with others, for me I will talk to someone (mentor/coach) about it and be objective at it.

• Cut down on social media time

Social media platforms connect us with the world, but we should always know when to turn it off and be present. Enjoy the moment you are in!

• Be kind to yourself

Take a break from the hustle and bustle of your life and explore your surroundings. Invest in caring for yourself through some exercise, yoga, or meditation. After all, knowing yourself and being aware is actually the most important job than anything else in your life.

• Focus on gratitude

Be grateful for what you already have and sometimes writing it on a journal or saying it out aloud would be a boost of confidence that you just need.

• Seek out real connections

Reach out to some friends and make some plans for an outing. This can be a nice change of pace and could help you shake off the fear of missing out. 

The list is not exhaustive. Most of us could have this and we may not even be aware of it. Don’t give fear the power to rule over you. Instead, rise above it. Be present and cherish the people right in front of you. Do not let technology impact your mood or dictate how you choose to live. Do not let it feed you with insecurities and jealousies.

Happiness is letting go of what you think your life is supposed to look like and celebrating it for everything that it is.

– Mandy Hale

That’s all from us. Stay happy and safe.

Written By: Miss Loshinee Krishnanmuthy

Love,
The Crazy Geek Team

Why We Need To Have A Goal?

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Why we need to set goals in life?

The exact definition of a goal, according to Wikipedia, is a desired outcome that an entity or system envisions, plans and commits to achieving a desired personal or organizational endpoint in some form of assumed growth. By setting deadlines, several individuals aim to accomplish targets within a limited time. In other words, whatever you intend for the future, no matter what it is, is a target. But the next time you plan to do the weekly chores or decide to watch that very cool action movie after work, always bear in mind that these tiny tasks count as goals and you are setting goals while obviously insignificant. Therefore, are you setting targets for yourself? What are your priorities for 1 year to come? How about in 10 years? In life, what are your aspirations? The first stage of successful objective achievement is the setting of goals. This marks the first step towards achievement. It’s when you move from a passive state to being involved in life.

FIRSTLY, YOUR LIFE WILL BE UNDER YOUR CONTROL. A lot of people are sleepwalking through life today. They don’t feel like they are getting what they want, even if they work hard. That’s because where they want to go, what they want to do, they have no path. Students graduate and they’re not sure what to do with their lives; when they hit their 40s, adults work for years and are surprised and they don’t know what to do next. You break out of your autopilot mode and begin to live a life of your conscious creation when you start setting goals and dream about what you want. Instead of letting others tell you what to do, you take the lead proactively and think about what you want for yourself. As Bill Copeland says, you can spend your entire life running up and down and not accomplishing something when you don’t set objectives. You’re really only following the purposes of others, not yours.

“The trouble with not having a goal is that you can spend your life running up and down the field and never score.” – Bill Copeland

NEXT, YOU WILL KNOW WHICH SCOPE TO FOCUS IN YOUR LIFE. Objectives give you emphasis. Although you are given a general guide by a life objective, your objectives give you laser focus as to exactly what to spend your time and energy on. As the input, think of your energy and the outcomes as the output. You create a focal point when you have a target, where your energy can be channeled to create the full reward. Here you prioritise and define the key action measures to get top grades, such as choosing the best class combination for optimum grades, reviewing examination papers from last year, consulting your teachers, and making a study schedule, while eliminating time consuming tasks such as excessive use of social media and binge-watching TV shows. As I said, setting goals helps you reflect on what’s important to you, what you want to do, and where you want to be in the future. In decision making, this viewpoint helps. You are in a stronger place to make choices that will impact your path in life if you know where you want to go. If you know what is important to you and what you really want to achieve, you can make a better decision about how you want to proceed.

“You need a plan to build a house. To build a life, it is even more important to have a plan or goal.” – Zig Ziglar

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BESIDES THAT, IT WILL KEEPS YOUR LIFE JOURNEY MOTIVATING. You align yourself with your innermost desires when you set goals. They help empower you and provide you with something to aspire for. If you’re not in a good place in life at the moment, this is particularly powerful. Your goals help remind you of the things you love, redirect your focus away from the negative obstacles, and reconnect you with your innermost desires. “Obstacles are those frightening things you see when you take your eyes off your target, to quote Henry Ford.” When you feel pessimistic and down, it’s mostly because you feel like you have little worth looking forward to. The rainbow to aim for, to drive you out of the storm, are your goals. I will meditate and reflect on some of the most important goals in my life, such as all the people I wish to reach out to and support in the world, if I ever lost motivation. I can imagine with total clarity the situation, as if it were happening now. This instantly links me with my inner self as I recall my WHY (my deepest motivation), after which I will immediately feel energized.

“The great thing in this world is not so much where we are, but in what direction we are moving.” – Oliver Wendell Holmes

FURTHERMORE, SEATING GOALS GIVES YOU PERSONAL SATISFACTION AND PURPOSE OF LIFE WILL BE REALIZED. Goals make your life more complicated, but they give you a sense of personal fulfilment at the same time. Setting your personal goals and achieving them makes you understand your talents and gives you an idea of your full potential. The key strategy for helping you achieve your full potential is setting goals. Each effective step towards achieving your short-term and long-term goals creates confidence and gives you a sense of personal pride. The more you do, the better you will feel about yourself. In their lives, people need a sense of purpose, and goals will give you that feeling of purpose. Your ambitions give you reasons to get up in the morning, a purpose act, and a reason to live the life you wanted, instead of only going through the motions and living from day to day. The process of setting goals helps you determine your purpose in life. You discover your intent by taking the time to reflect on who you are and what you want to do in your life. If you focus your priorities on that target, your life becomes more important.

“The reason most people never reach their goals is that they don’t define them, or ever seriously consider them as believable or achievable. Winners can tell you where they are going, what they plan to do along the way, and who will be sharing the adventure with them.” – Denis Watley

IN ADDITION, YOUR LIFE MOMENTUM WILL BE BOOST UP NO MATTER HOW HARD SITUATION TURNS. Objectives provide you with optimism and something to aspire to. In itself, it can be really motivating to have a big target to think about and imagine achieving. You are able to reach some short-term targets when you start with your long-term goals. Your long-term target becomes more achievable with those achievements. The more you are able to meet short-term goals, the more you believe you can achieve your ultimate target. Your motivation is fueled by the feeling of success and continues to inspire you to accomplish even more. In addition, that encouragement and optimistic feelings can help you get through several challenges along the way that you can encounter. Your mind tends to reflect more on how to fulfil those objectives until you have specific written objectives. You start to make regular strides towards your objectives instead of only dreaming that you can do something someday. And the smallest acts on a regular basis, over the course of a year, add up to big results.

“Your goals are the road maps that guide you and show you what is possible for your life.” – Les Brown

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NEVERTHELESS, PROCRASTINATION ALSO CAN BE AVOIDED BY SETTING GOALS AND OUR LARGEST GOALS TURNS INTO MANAGEABLE ONES. You make yourself responsible for finishing the assignment when you set a goal for yourself. This is in complete contrast to when you do things based on a whim and whether or not you complete them doesn’t matter. Goals tend to stick in your mind, and they give you a reminder to complete and accomplish it. Lots of us have big dreams and hopes. It’s one of the things that makes life exciting for us! But a lot of us never take the time to figure out how we can get from point A to point B effectively. So, unfortunately, we have never entirely accomplished those targets. We look at our dreams and convince ourselves that they are ever accomplished by only a select few people, so we write off ourselves as individuals not meant to achieve that level of success. It can be intimidating, daunting, and discourage us from even pursuing them to look at the final product of a target. Fortunately, setting goals allows us to split big, daunting goals into smaller ones. These small measures and more realistic milestones will help us build momentum and motivate us to continue moving towards the next level of our target. The foundation from which we can start to create the life we really want to have for ourselves, our families, and maybe even for our societies, depending on how large your goals are! Whenever I get talking about this aspect of goal setting, I can’t help but think about the mountain climbing analogy, and that the best way to climb a mountain is simply step by step.

“Far away there in the sunshine are my highest aspirations. I may not reach them, but I can look up and see their beauty, believe in them, and try to follow where they lead.” -Louisa May Alcott

LAST BUT NOT LEAST, always remember this, ” Ideas are great. Goals are great. Thinking is great ……But always remember EXECUTION is Much much better. It’s time to stop thinking and start doing…… “If you have a goal in life that takes a lot of energy, that requires a lot of work, that incurs a great deal of interest and that is a challenge to you, you will always look forward to waking up to see what the new day brings.” Susan Polis Schultz

HEALTHY LIFESTYLE

The start of a new decade brings with the new resolutions to improve one’s life, including a healthier lifestyle. Our most and main in to-do list but never be like how importantly we make through it. Do you live a healthy lifestyle? How healthy are you? Do you have a healthy diet? Have you had a health care tips? How well you’ve taken the effort to care yourself and your body? Well, most of us failed to make time for us in our busy living. Am I right? I was pretty lazy and careless at the beginning of my very bad health issue. That attitude totally spoiled my well being at one stage. Trust me that was horrifying. I’ve took an initiative to work on my health and it takes quite longer for me to make up my mind to do all the variations by working out the tips. And the magic happens. Good health isn’t just about healthy eating and exercise, it is also how you can carry a positive self-image, positive attitude and a healthy lifestyle. So, let me do the WHY’s.

‘Healthy living’ to most of us means both physical and mental health are in balance or functioning well together in a person. Our body is our temple and of it. Do you know Malaysia has the highest rate of obesity and overweight we need to take care among? Asian countries with 64% of male and 65% of female population being either one? That’s insane! Our stressful life got us to rely more on foods to relief. You must have agreed with me. I’m curious about nearly everything that contributes to living a healthier, vibrant and mindful life since I’m here to bring you for a healthy ride. I know that with your busy life, it can seem difficult if not impossible to nourish, care for and move your body in a way that supports vibrant health and radiant beauty. I wouldn’t be able to mirrored myself happily with all the magic I’ve been taken into act. Only few simple and easy doing to Eat-Live-Move.

I would jumpstart healthy change with a basic and easiest method to follow up, just drink water as much you can totally most of us don’t do every day including myself with giggles. As I realize water is essential for our bodies to function. Do you know ever 60% of our body is made up of water? It is also needed to carry out body functions, remove waste, and carry nutrients and oxygen around our body. Since we lose water daily through urine, bowel movements, perspiration, and breathing, we need to replenish our water intake. Furthermore, drinking water helps in losing weight, making you less hungry and less likely to overeat which helps from being overweight or obese. Get yourself enough of water to boost you every hour and to get hydrated, why you waiting for? Go drink some water first before you continue reading!

How often you exercise? When was the last you got on the track? That’s ok, hang on. A physical activity and exercise it’s a major contributor to a healthy lifestyle apart from the other tips to work on. Movement is life it is. Research has shown that exercising daily brings tremendous benefits to our health such as lowering of risk of diseases, higher bone density, and weight loss. I would suggest you to pick a sport of your liking. Exercise its all about being healthy and having fun at the same time. When you enjoy a sport, you naturally want to do it more because it works well for me. I engage myself to maintain and balance my self-esteem and self-confidence. Since I dance, I’ve started doing aerobics exercise, also called cardio is one of the best workouts to do. It’s particularly effective at reducing belly fat, the harmful type of fat that builds up around your organs. So, that’s how aerobic does the wonders in me. Never too old to start exercising, so pick an easy doing workout to keep yourself active and for a better health.

How you can eat healthy food every day. Eating healthy is one of the hardest parts of changing your lifestyle to a healthy one. It’s easy to grab fast food or go out dinner and get your favorite pasta. Wait, what? Pasta!!! One of yummy Italian I love to dine in. As all of us have our favorites foods. A healthy idiom, “you are what you eat” says it all. The very first plan is to organize your meals. The bulk of food consumption should consist of healthy foods, fruits, vegetables, whole grains, and fat-free or low-fat products. Take a bite of fruits and eat green more on your daily meal. Most importantly, avoid eating a large meal before bed, such pattern may become a lifelong habit which is also unhealthy. No matter what, eat three healthy meals a day, bare in mind that dinner does not have to be the largest meal. In a busy schedule, all of us fail to feed us on time and I hope we can make a time as we are aging for our healthy life.

Life has a habit of getting busy, but if you never make time for your sleep, it’ll impact your health. I used to have a proper sleeping hour yet at some point it was out of track. A good night’s sleep is incredibly important for your health. Poor sleep can drive insulin resistance, disrupt your appetite hormones, and reduce your physical and mental performance. If you realize some of us don’t have the energy to work all day long that is when you missed your precious sleep. A longer sleep has been shown to improve many aspects of athletic and physical performance. It is good for you to get 8 hours of sleep how all of wished for. One of the sickening mental health issues, such as depression are strongly linked to poor sleep quality and sleeping disorders well known as insomnia. Let’s not a start of this habit. So how can you make sure that being tired doesn’t prompt you to make a bad choice? Aim to get between seven and nine hours to sleep per night, and try to find the ideal amount of sleep for your body. You will, you can.

While exercise, a balanced diet, and a healthy lifestyle are important to keep oneself healthy, it is also very important to go for health checkups at periodic intervals. A generation ago, we used to see their doctor only when we sick, or dying. Today, preventative health care is becoming common place as we become more educated and empowered about our own health. As doctors are also requesting that patients get regular check-ups to help stay on top of our health. Regular check-ups can help find potential health issues before they become a problem. They are able to detect health conditions or diseases early, “prevention is better than cure” it is.

Besides, checkups will make you more aware of your health. This also makes us more likely to make poorer decisions regarding our health, especially when it comes to exercise and food we eat. As mentioned earlier, going for Full Body Checkups and other types of preventive checkups regularly helps prevent and avoid diseases as well as to treat at early stage. Have you done yours? Get yourself a healthy insurance from a medical checkup every now and then ensures that you are healthy. What kind of health checkup Package should I choose? If you ask, most hospitals and health providers will guide you through. A necessary for you to get yourself informed that you’re healthy.

When we think of healthy lifestyle immediately it strikes in mind of diet and exercise that we completely ignore mental health. However, mental health is one of the most important factors in creating a healthy routine. How can you be mentally strong and happy? There are many cute little things you can do to boost yourself and your surroundings mentally free. Start your day with a cup of coffee. Coffee consumption is linked to lower rates of depression. If you can’t drink coffee because of the caffeine, try another good drink of your favorites. If it’s me hot chocolate is everything to boost my day. Track gratitude and achievement with a journal. Include 3 things you were grateful for and 3 things you were able to accomplish each day. Work your strengths. Do something you’re good at to build self-confidence, then tackle a tougher task. Besides, take time to laugh. Hang out with your friends, share each other’s happiness, make jokes and tease one another. Laughter helps reduce anxiety. Best therapy you can ever give yourself.

Practice forgiveness, even if it’s just forgiving that person who cut you off during your commute. People who forgive have better mental health and report being more satisfied with their lives. Feeling stressed? Smile. It may not be the easiest thing to do, but smiling can help to lower your heart rate and calm you down. That smile on your face, may bright up someone’s day too. Send a thank you note, not for a material item, but to let someone know why you appreciate them. Written expressions of gratitude are linked to increased happiness and make the bond with another even stronger. Spend some good time with your dearest family. Have a cookout, go to a park, or watch movie together and etc. We are 12 times more likely to feel happy on days that they spend 6-7 hours with family. Do it often as we say One Happy Family at Home. All of these definitely for our happy living with a strong mental health.

The top best six ways personally I’ve taken a charge to make a little change un my daily routine. Changing to a healthy lifestyle is a common goal and it is our responsibility too, but where should you actually begin? Right here! If you do maintain a healthy lifestyle, there are many benefits for you to gain. A longer life, the ability to enjoy natural foods, a wholesome sense of self-esteem and the joy of respecting your body for all that it does for you. Timeless tips, so bookmark this and integrate into your life. Share out with your family and friends to help them stay healthy because Sharing is Caring, Caring is Loving. Happy Healthy Living everyone.

Does Guiding Others Help You Grow?

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Yes. Guiding others helps you grow. I believe this to be a fact of life. This could be explained as “by giving advice and help, one can be able to improve themselves in strength, skill or quality”. Now looking back again, do you agree with the statement? Naturally, there may be a lot of questions that may surround this. What is guiding? What is considered as growth? Why is that important? And etc. To address them in detail and in an easier manner, let’s see this from these 3 perspectives; what; when; and how.

What does this mean? A simple explanation.

“Guide”, this word has been heard commonly. The most relatable reference to the word is probably when we are travelling. Guide is the expert who leads the excursion to ensure that the travel objectives are met, which usually comprises of sightseeing that covers all the interesting spots and governing everyone’s safety.

Onto the next important part – with all the rapid changes that goes on around us, a constant is the discussion that surrounds the concept of Growth. There was a saying by John Henry Newman, an English Poet in the 19th century which remains relevant to this date. “Growth is the only evidence of Life”. I sincerely believe that growth is a lifelong journey as we are always learning and growing in one way or another.

What does this mean? A simple explanation.

“Guide”, this word has been heard commonly. The most relatable reference to the word is probably when we are travelling. Guide is the expert who leads the excursion to ensure that the travel objectives are met, which usually comprises of sightseeing that covers all the interesting spots and governing everyone’s safety.

Onto the next important part – with all the rapid changes that goes on around us, a constant is the discussion that surrounds the concept of Growth. There was a saying by John Henry Newman, an English Poet in the 19th century which remains relevant to this date. “Growth is the only evidence of Life”. I sincerely believe that growth is a lifelong journey as we are always learning and growing in one way or another.

How does it Benefit the Guide?

Thus far, we have talked about what guiding and growth is, and what it takes to be a guide. And now to answer the thought whether guiding others help us grow, I would like to take the points discussed above and put them in perspective. Being an expert and helping others on the subject matter, doesn’t just mean that we are helping someone to improve a skill. It also means we are constantly putting our own skills to test. The saying as old as time, “Practice makes Perfect” captures the essence of it. We will repeat this task multitude of times to ensure our skills are near to perfection. Furthermore, we will put in hours and effort to stay on top of things on our skillset. To know the latest updates and even innovating ways to enhance your skills to be able to be a better guide. When we know we are leading others, our inner ethical compass will push and motivate us to be the best guide we can be.

Besides the personal input, as sure as day follows a night you can be sure that our exposure to others while guiding will indirectly help us grow. When we are guiding, more often than not we do the work side by side with others. And not only does this sharpen our skills, but we learn different things from being involved in it every single time with a different person. Whether it is their view on the matter or a new methodology they initiate that we could have never thought of. As guides we could be set in our ways, but every now and then our whole viewpoint could be challenged by a fellow learner. This contrast will force us to approach things from different angles. And at the end of the day, we simply have gained more knowledge and grown whether if it’s on the subject matter of something totally newfangled, i.e. growth in self-reflection, different subjects, empathy, etc.

A simple yet close to heart experience that I carry with me to this day is a memory with a friend of mine back in my schooldays. She admittedly was much more hardworking when it comes to revising schoolwork. She would have done multiple exercises each day and will come into school the following day to clarify her doubts with her fellow classmates. As it happens, during our exam season she approached me for a query that I had not come across when I revised for the subject. When I couldn’t help her instantly, I spent a fair amount of time re-reading and working on the problem to find a solution and finally was able to solve it with her. Coincidentally, the same sort of question appeared in our exam paper. And all I could think was a million thanks to my friend who had approached me for guidance on this. If not for her, I would have not learned that and probably ended up giving a “rojak” answer in the exam. In a nutshell, guiding her on that question, helped me grow my knowledge base on the subject and this lesson that guiding is a two-way growth was embedded into my mind.

In conclusion, we have established that guiding essentially is helping someone do or achieve something by themselves. This could be in an intense scale, like a coach guiding a team to victory. Or a laid back one, where when a child attempts to cook for the first time, the mother remains as a guide throughout. The guiding process may vary as per the objectives, but the methodology remains. And as a result, the guide will always remain an expert in their subject matter and even master new aspects, because it is a two-way learning process. At the end of the day growth is an inevitable side effect of guiding.

Now think back to a time where you have casually guided a person on something or anything. Recall your experience and reflect on the growth it brought into your life. Hope this brings some new perspective and awareness to the benefits of being guides in any aspect of life and thus continue growing together as a society.

That’s all from us now.

Keep smiling and stay safe everyone.

From Crazygeek team.

Empty Cup

Hi everyone, wishing that all of you have been granted with good health.

Empty Cup, empty cup… empty cup. Honestly I have heard this saying before, however I have never spent time to actually understand this on a deeper level.

When I finally sat down to think it through, I realized the deeper meaning it held.

If you have tea in your cup, you cannot fill with coffee,

You have to empty it first,

Like you can’t redirect to discover, if you’re mixed with your fixed beliefs,

Open up your mind.

Ija Ghazali

Life is not a constant. Circumstances change and so do people with it. In order for you to grow, you can’t adamantly keep holding onto the things you’ve always known and expect the new experiences and knowledge to fit into the same box. If you do so, it is highly likely that you won’t be able to learn or discover new things in life that will enrich your experiences not only by deepening your knowledge but also through challenging your current perspective on things you might have overlooked in the past.

And that is what this topic of empty cup is all about.

I’ll share with you my experience on this matter. My best friend and I are usually opposite sides of a pole. Hahaha. I think the only factor that keeps our 14 years of friendship going is the love we have for each other. Before this, I tend to stick with what I knew. So even if I wanted something new, it simply must fit with all the things I had accepted previously. So, naturally I was always opposed to her suggestions and her opinions on certain matters that did not allign with my beliefs.

Then one day, she told me that not all the ways of life and things we are used to will remain valid throughout time even when the topic may remain the same.

Also, just because her suggestions and opinions does not meet all the criteria I want or believe, it doesn’t mean it is not applicable for me. If I couldn’t even let her freely express herself without influencing it with my own input from the start, how will I be able to see how this matter could give an actual impact to me.

It is the Greek philosopher Aristotle who said, “to Unlearn is as hard as to Learn”.

It’s a hard fact to accept but with time it was easier to digest it. Then I tried to comprehend what she had said without the effects of any of my previous beliefs or ways I thought was acceptable. Soon I realized that I thought that I knew enough from my own experiences, but in reality there was a major part that I had overlooked which could potentially solve my puzzle. The things I thought I knew, is not what all I needed to know. This gave me a bigger lesson about my preconceptions in every matter.

And soon, I started to truly listen and accept the opinion or advise that is being presented to me. Only at a later part I explored it in detail and made my own hypothesis and then coming to my own conclusion.
We have to be open minded when we are introduced to new things in life to truly accept a variety of experiences. This does not mean to blindly accept and apply everything, but to be open to explore its capabilities in its full extend. It is like when you thought the quickest road was the one you always have used, but actually, as the time goes by or without you even realizing it, there is a road much effective to get to that place has arised.

Dear readers, I want you to know that not all things that oppose your views are inapplicable for you. Open up your mind on something, know that not all things you know are enough or will always be applicable. There will be parts to upgrade or redirect. You are not losing anything if you are accepting it. You are simply learning more…

That’s all from us. May this inspire something in you. Be positive and look beyond what you see.

Take care and stay safe.

With Love,
Crazy Geek Team

Lessons of 2020

Starting off with a very grumpy and reactive mood into the year because I had to move away from the environment and the people which I inspire and ideal the most. I was not accepting myself for making those choices yet blaming others and want to prove to everyone I can also do something about mylife. After all, I only need to take care of mylife, no one else will do it for me.

The real lessons started when the whole world was hit by the pandemic, never took this word “pandemic” very seriously back then, but now a little kid also will know about it.

Lesson 1: Spend more time with family

I’m kind of person who priotise work / study more than anything else in my life including my own wellbeing. I have not spend enough time with my parents enough, most time is just arguing or just having some random conversations. But this year was absolutely amazing because I realized something really hard, we all have not much time, I spend more time with my parents dancing, exercising and having meaningful conversations. They do have a lot of stories when they were young, go and dig it as much as you can ; it’s gonna be super funny, trust me.

Family is like music, some high notes, some low notes, but always a beautiful song,

Pinterest

Lesson 2: Be Grateful with what you already have

I have a beautiful family, beautiful me (hahahah), fairly good intellect that can think, my current knowledge, my spiritual being (more aware about my own thoughts, words & actions), finances. To be truthful, I didn’t realised that I was bind with money so much until I realised that I equate myself as a successful person if you are earning more, so initially I was very frustrated about myself on why I’m not earning so much, this is definitely a battle between mind vs heart, my heart wants me to live a simple life with earning enough for me and help others which I can afford. All in all, what are we going to bring back when we are on death bed. I firmly choose my heart and said the most important thing in this entire world is my happiness. Then, it slowed down eventually.

Lesson 3: If you haven’t found something that fascinates you by heart, keep searching never settle for anything you are not waking up looking forward to

“Passion is energy. Feel the power that comes from focusing on what excites you.”

Oprah Winfrey

Eventhough my heart asked me to jump into small and medium sized enterprises rather than big four or multinational companies, I still have the doubt whether is this field really for me. But one thing I kept in my mind, I’m not going to settle for anything less that what my worth is/talent is. I would say right after my college, the search for this is getting stronger, definitely I do not want to spend my 40 years of my life doing something I don’t like. Actually to my surprise, I’m quite creative too (liked writing blogs), doing videos, being creative with my posts, creating content. I started to venture into teaching world, something very close to my heart because that makes me happy. Being and working in a firm gives me the experiences and opportunity for me to apply what I have learned then sharing my experiences so that others can learn too. So dear readers, go all out there find out what you really want to do, focus on that, find the happiness and I can now tell you that nothing else can bit that, even tons of money wouldn’t.

Lesson 4: Accept your failures, you don’t have to perfect

Easier said than done. I failed many times at work, consistent habit change, deliver projects to client, spending time with family, making time for myself and many more. Being an accountant and auditor, I’m wired to be perfect, never make mistakes as it involves dollar sign most of the times. However, I realized the more I hold myself back that I’m being emotional that I made mistake, the more I’m losing my self confidence. This year made me a bit wiser that self confidence is the key for whatever you are doing be it new or existing projects.

I’m mesmerized with this quote of my favourite from the late President of India

If you fail, never give up because F.A.I.L. means “First Attempt In Learning”. End is not the end; in fact E.N.D. means “Effort Never Dies”. If you get NO as an answer, remember N.O. means “Next Opportunity”.

Abdul Kalam

Lesson 5: Accepting good and bad circumstances that happen to you, most importantly accept yourself

Let me share a story on how this little girl realised how bad she was treating her oneself until the age of 24.

Imagine this little cute girl that ties her hair neatly and put a pony tail for her school everyday. She is a very obedient girl who obeys all the instructions given by the teacher and also parents. So everyone around her liked her so much, some of their friends also said I’m jealous with you because you are smart and also beautiful. She was very happy and was at the top of the sky all the time. She feels she needs to be treated as if she needs to get all the attention and importance.

However, everything she was getting attention and praises started to diminish when she entered into college and her workplace, she is no more the “STAR” of the environment. She felt that she needs to compete with others to show that she is better than others, this is where she started lying about the little things to show that she is perfect and she never does mistakes. She become not truthful to herself, what do you expect her to be true to others. She should very grateful that at the age of 21 someone very wise pointed that out to her that you have a lot of EGO and also you are not being truthful to yourself. Instead of she be happy with the lesson, she got angry towards it and try to prove to others that she is better. Everything fall apart, her relationship, her bigger goals, her spiritual journey and finances. That is when she started looking backward and asked 1 question to herself “Who do you want to blame for everything that happens to you?”

This time she started thinking, the only person to blame is myself. That is when everything started to change. She started accepting flaws in herself and one thing to let the readers to get your thoughts to think “Don’t you think each of us as a human, has both good and bad as well as strength and weaknesses, so we do need to accept ourselves. That little girl started to accept that she also has her dark side of herself (competition, jealously, feeling good when someone fall, EGO and etc.) Only when you accept that you have those characters in yourself, you can grow and become a better person. She’s also someone who are not very focused, have very short span of focus (zone out a lot), but this was initially not being accepted by her ownself.

Lesson 6: Stand for your grounds

When you are at your workplace, we must put all our efforts to stay with what we believe. There’s an experience when I was treated badly by my co-worker and I felt not self-worthy being at the workplace. However, in workplace or anywhere in your life, handle them very professionally and make an objective decision in your life. Staying on your ground while everyone else is against you making you uniquely you.

Hope the above lessons will benefit y’all in any kind of way. Let’s hope we have a better year ahead learning more lessons about ourselves.

With Love,

Crazy Geek Team

How To Deal With Toxic And Negative people

Dealing with toxic people is something we all gone through such phase in our lives at one point or another. Sometimes it’s more like immersion. Honestly, facing them was never my way of life. I’m sure it’s not yours as well, but we all have toxic people in our lives who can’t be avoided from our narrow circle, I mean. Do you agree with me? Narcissists, compulsive liars, sociopaths, manipulators, gossipers, and those wallowing in self-pity are just a few examples of toxic people.

A quote from the Dalai Lama, a living Buddha, about toxic people comes to mind: Let’s give up negative people. They only show up to share problems, complaints, fear and judgement on others. If somebody is looking for a bin to throw all their trash into, make sure it’s not in your mind” If Dalai Lama is letting go toxicity off his shoulders, shouldn’t you? As when I began to appreciate my mental and emotional well-being and practice taking care of myself.

All this of course, easier said than done. So, how do you deal with people you’d rather avoid at all costs? Don’t worry, I’m here to rescue. Fortunately, there are many ways to prevent toxic people from governing your life. Knowing them will help you to avoid falling in their trap or influence, as much it helps dear self to get rid of negativity too. It works as well. Prepare yourself to move forward the positivity and always remain in your intuition for your good that I firmly believe in mine is to avoid toxicity.

Mainly, recognize and distance yourself from their behavior. It’s certainly not easy to climb above him when some people are so determined to drag you through the fray. But make sure recognizing that people are toxic should be the first step toward desensitizing yourself from their words and actions. Ask yourself, “Do I value this person’s opinion?” and “Do they have my best interest at heart?” If you’re so doubtful in that, then don’t worry much about them. Distance yourself emotionally, physically you’ll be alright after sometime until whatever a toxic character does, wouldn’t bother you anymore.

Secondly, set your limits with the toxic ones. Believe me, toxic people don’t have limits. They have a tendency to control others as well as the situations. You can set limits on the things you can control. Don’t spend much time or effort with them. Keep your interactions brief and the topics light. They will listen to you, but they will never know how they will transmit it to you. This is how your words might be diverted to the rest they shared so they would look better. Have you been victimized by sharing something with toxic people with the trust? If yes, be very careful with the choice of words and mind what you share with someone with negativity. It’s for your betterment with the rest you’re in good terms.

Utilize your support system. If you’re lucky, you have a support system for people who are non-toxic. Gather your support forces if necessary. As we get older, we really want to be surrounded by the right people. People who are good for you, good to you and good for your soul. As it is says’ “the higher your vibe is, the smaller your tribe is”. Your attached heads are the one who values you to keep things in perspective that you’re not the problem. So keep your circle close and in this manner, I am blessed to have good souls around me. Fortunate feeling that I was able to be meet genuine ones in the process of me growing. Those coping mechanisms aren’t developed overnight. Tune out as soon as possible from the toxicity if you could and build a good relationship with your loyal ones around.

How do you reconcile cordiality with not wanting to normalize the abusive emotional behavior of an individual? But toxic people don’t respond well to criticism. It’s important to pick your battles wisely. Toxic people are good at exaggerating of a conversation, something that each of you have experienced including myself too. Be sure of what they’re trying to communicate with you and if possible, being a good listener will do to avoid unnecessary talks. You never know they intend to begin a conversation with you, do you? They are able to manipulate of a conversation which can be a controversy later. Don’t believe in the quarrel. You won’t win. And you don’t need to. Healthy wrestling is what you need in your life, not for interaction with toxic people.

Focus on the positive. I know how cliché this sounds. But I also know that if you dwell on how infuriating toxic people can be or the problems they create, it will stress you out. Do your best to catch yourself when you start to fixate on the negative and try to consciously switch your thoughts to situations or more positive situations. I was stuck at first among toxic characters but it took me a while to get out of these circumstances. Never easy because you can’t take responsibility or judge anybody with it.

With Love,

CRAZY GEEK TEAM